Opportunity is most often missed…

Opportunity is most often missed since it is dressed in overalls and looks like hard work. – Anonymous

Also stated as : Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.Thomas Edison

dressed in overalls and looks like hard work

What does that mean?
Most people expect opportunity to knock on their door from time to time. But what do you expect to see when one opens the door? Many expect to see opportunity dressed in a suit, holding a bouquet of balloons and a very large check.

Unfortunately, that’s not what opportunity is, at least for 99.9% of us. Opportunity is just that, an opening, a chance to apply yourself and make something happen. Opportunity, when it knocks on your door, is usually a chance to work your butt off for a significant amount of time with the hope for a great reward at the end (if everything goes well).

Why is hard work important?
Here, when I say hard work, I mean work of a non-trivial level of effort over a non-trivial period of time. Hard work is the opposite of feather dusting the coffee table. And I don’t just mean physical work. Planning, organizing, putting something together, that can be hard work for the brain.

But why is hard work so important? Among other things, hard work builds character. It develops long term habits of actually doing something, day in, day out, whether you want to or not. It is effort, it is courage, it is conscience, it is growth, it is persistence and it is perseverance.

When repeated, it becomes dependability, it becomes follow through, it becomes dignity, it becomes habit, it becomes momentum, it becomes understanding, and it becomes self respect.

Eventually, when repeated throughout a lifetime, it yields accomplishment, it yields exceptionalism, it yields leadership, and it yields knowledge.

All these attributes are valuable to me, and so, by extension, is hard work. Hopefully you found enough of the attributes listed above to be of interest to motivate you to continue to do hard work.

Where can I apply this in my life?
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been there many times in my life. Do I really want to go to work today? Do I really want to do the blog today? Do I really want to do yard work this weekend? Do I really want to take the trash all the way out to the curb?

Note that none of the things listed above (with the exception of going to work) fit my definition of hard work due to lack of any significant duration. However, all of them get back to the character issue of actually doing something when it is supposed to be done, even if no one would notice. Some would say you need to do it, especially if no one would notice.

I guess the biggest reason I’ve kept with the concept of doing hard work was from my days playing team sports, football in particular. Nobody liked running wind sprints, but you never knew on game day when you’d need that burst of speed. On defense, you might need it to make a game saving tackle. On offense, you might need it to get down-field to throw the block that springs the running back for the game winning touchdown. The point was you worked hard so it was never YOU who let the team down.

This is also something that is part of Boy Scouts. Making Eagle isn’t easy, but it isn’t terribly hard either. It does take consistent, thorough action over a long period of time. Long enough to make some lifelong habits, including the willingness to do hard work. For example, in the 112th Congress, 29 members are Eagle Scouts, including 11 of the 100 members of the Senate.

I use conscious competence for remembering to do hard work. If you don’t want to do it, don’t waste energy making an excuse, just do it and get it over with. Every time. No exceptions. Set a schedule and stick to it. Make allowances for stopping short of completion if it’s 3 in the morning. Don’t make allowances for stopping at 3 in the afternoon just because the game is on. A valid exception would be if you scheduled your day so that you could watch the game. Just be sure everything that was supposed to be done gets completed before you sit down to watch the game & get up when it’s done and continue getting things done.

Hard work isn’t as hard as most people seem to think it is. It’s just that not doing hard work is so much easier. Develop a pattern, a habit, of doing hard work and pretty soon it’s easy. It becomes a part of who you are, and how you operate. When others make excuses, you get things done. And it keeps you ready for when opportunity knocks on your door.

From: Twitter, undocumented feed (my bad)
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/t/thomasaed104931.html
Photo courtesy of grendelkhan

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The great question is not…

The great question is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with failure. – Chinese Proverbs  (This has also been attributed to Laurence J. Peter, but I think the Chinese may have said it first)  8)

What does that mean?
It means that failure is inevitable. It is part of the learning process. If you have never failed, you simply aren’t trying to the best of your ability. But the real question is what are you going to do about the failure? Will you learn from it, or will it keep you down? Are you content with the failure or will you get up and try again? Most of us will, most of the time, get back up and try again.

Why is failure important?
Failure? Important? Have I lost my mind? Well, it has to do with a different definition of failure than I normally use. To me, failure only occurs when you don’t get back up and try again. But in the case of this quote, failure is defined as something not working according to plan. Those kind of ‘failures’ occur all the time.

Imagine what kind of a world it would be if we never failed. This can be done in one of two ways. One is by being so incredibly wise, intelligent and gifted that everything you touch turns to gold and no problem can remained unsolved after but the briefest glance. The other is to not start basic arithmetic until Junior High, hold off on the multiplication tables until High School and limit Algebra to those brainiacs in College or University (and everything else similarly dumbed down to the point that even a head of lettuce wouldn’t fail).

While the first option sounds like a mad scientist’s best dream, the other is a dystopia of mind boggling proportions. In reality, we learn interactively. Try something, note the results, and try again (hopefully in a slightly different manner). Every failure has, as it’s silver lining, a lesson for us to learn. Without failure, learning would be a bit more difficult.

Where can I apply this in my life?
For me, chemistry was always a tough class, especially the labs. Today, I have trouble in the kitchen, which is just a Chem Lab with edible ingredients and (hopefully) edible results. Even though I know how to read the instructions, somehow I manage to mangle most of what I touch. I learn from each experience, but I now cook so rarely, that it may take another decade or two to get the hang of a scratch-built cake.

Therein lies the problem for many of us. We do something, it doesn’t turn out well, so we set it aside for a while before trying again. In that interval, we have forgotten most of what we learned from the failure (if we even took the time to get past the frustration and learn from the experience). To make progress, we have to get back to it as soon as possible and repeat the process. We may have to learn the lesson several times before it sticks, so repetition, once again, is the mother of skill.

I learned this in Martial Arts as well. Some people were showing up once a week. In the six days they had off, they managed to forget most of what they learned last week, and were learning the same handful of skills over and over again, making almost no progress. For a while I was going six days a week and was making phenomenal progress. When I had to drop down to four days a week, my progress dropped by approximately half. I just wasn’t making as many mistakes, and the time off allowed me to forget some of what I had learned from the mistakes.

The big question is part of the quote: Are you content with failure? To me, it’s only labeled a failure if you stop before you achieve success. If you keep after it, you will eventually get success. Then you can stop and not have it be a failure. Edison could have stopped before he got the incandescent light-bulb, but he kept at it (along with all his helpers).

From: Twitter, undocumented feed (my bad)
confirmed at: http://en.proverbia.net/citastema.asp?tematica=442&page=2 about 2/3 of the way down

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Remember, fear doesn’t exist…

You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.Dale Carnegie

Shortened for Twitter to : “For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.”

What does that mean?
This basic truth has been said many times by many people through the ages. It is just the simple fact that fear is almost entirely mental. That’s not to say that fear is useless, it serves its purpose. But one shouldn’t consider fear to be the only scale on which to measure their actions.

Here, I take conquering fear to mean not the absence of fear, but the ability to do what needs to be done in spite of being fearful. This, to me, is the same as conquering an enemy, or overcoming an obstacle. The enemy still exists, the obstacle is still there, you have simply gone beyond needing to worry about these things. You have conquered them, not blasted them out of existence. Does that differentiation make sense?

Why is fear important?
Fear is that little something that lets us know that things are not going well. It is part of the fight-or-flight reflex that gives us that surge, giving us an edge for the next few moments.

Sometimes fear is a good thing. Without it, we might do really stupid, hurtful or even fatal things. How many jokes have someone saying “Hey, y’all! Watch this!”? As often as not, it’s their last words.

On the flip side, unreasoning fear is not a good thing. Being afraid of Tigers is a good thing if you live in an area where they roam. For most of us, Tigers aren’t that big of a worry. Being afraid of shadows or water or heights is one thing. But being afraid of them to the point where it impacts how you live your life is another thing entirely.

Where can I apply this in my life?
We have talked about fear and how to confront and overcome it before, but this time we will discuss it in terms of the intellectual exercise. The fear in your mind, why is it there?

Fear is a very primitive emotion, and it seems to be attached to all the very primitive and powerful responses. It is the fight-or-flight response, the emotional intensity, the almost completely irrational response to a tiny little spider, mouse, snake, bat or other little creature. If you’re like me, just reading the last sentence has you a little on edge, right?

Why? I’m not even afraid of any of those creatures. I like playing with daddy long legs spiders, I like mice, hamsters and gerbils (and have owned several as pets), have handled snakes of various kinds, and had a few encounters with bats. What is it that puts us on edge when discussing or even thinking of these creatures?

Some might say it’s some kind of racial memory, that humans fear other creatures that can cause them injury or which can attack undetected due to size, ability to hide or to find us when we can’t see them. Perhaps it’s just that writers have long known of our dislike and fear of certain creatures and worked them into scary stories for so long that it is a form of folk knowledge.

Spiders might have had a bad reputation before the story of “Little Miss Muffet“, but for most of us, that was probably our first experience with spiders. And they were creatures to be afraid of, right?

Movies have been no better, given everything from Dracula (bats), Willard (rats), Snakes on a Plane (snakes) and every other monster movie around. They play to, and reinforce our fears, ungrounded in actual physical experience (in most cases – walking into a spider web doesn’t count, that’s just creepy).

That is a big part of what make Alfred Hitchcock’s movie “The Birds” such a scary movie. The monster of the film was innocent little birds, the nicest little creatures you can think of. Fear of something so benign and normal, that was quite a shock to the psyche. You might expect to be frightened by attacking swarms of bats, rats, snakes or spiders, but birds?

It just reinforces the quote’s point that fear is in the mind, and that most fears can be overcome if you are determined to do so. There are allowances, of course, for fear caused by actual trauma, and for fears caused by chemical imbalances. For most of us, fear can be overcome, once we set our mind to the task and employ proper methods.

But first comes the decision to overcome that fear. That sounds scary, doesn’t it? You might have to decide to overcome the fear of overcoming your fear, first. But do it, there will still be some fear, but you can move past it, overcome it, and move on with your life, not completely fearless, but neither will you be completely fear-full.

From: Twitter, @DavidRoads
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/d/dalecarneg378034.html

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Only the inner protection of patience…

Only the inner protection of patience can keep us from experiencing the turmoil of negative thoughts and emotions. – Dalai Lama

What does that mean?
Have you ever seen the commercials or videos where someone is standing still and everything is moving around them at super fast speed? That is what this quote reminds me of. Patience brings a kind of peace that allows the turmoil around us to exist without adversely affecting our well being.

When the turmoil is within, in the form of negative emotions and thoughts, it is even more important to be able to allow the turmoil to swirl around us without affecting us. Patience with all, but most importantly ourselves, can be a useful tool in this endeavor.

Why is patience important?
I want an answer, and I want it NOW! Right? We’ve all met that person, perhaps even been that person. Hopefully we’re doing at least a little better than that now.

In the context of this saying, I believe we are dealing specifically with ourselves. We all know that other people are only human, and can make allowances for their errors. In short, we can be patient (to a point) with others. But how do we treat ourselves?

Are we too demanding? Have we forgotten that we are human too, and that we have failings as well? Do we beat ourselves up when we mess things up, or do we have patience, kindness and forgiveness for ourselves?

Where can I apply this in my life?
I am a seriously Anal-Retentive and more than a little bit nit-pickey, so learning to be patient with myself was not easy. I still have days that are better and some that are worse, but I at least now understand the concept.

I started by trying to notice when I was being hard on myself and asking if there was a way to have prevented or avoided the issue. If the answer was no, then I chalked it up to experience and tried to relax a little bit. If it turned out that it was preventable and I screwed up, I tried to go a bit easier on myself and learn from my mistakes. It didn’t always work, but I’m getting better. You can do the same thing, just watch for when you’re being hard on yourself, and lighten up & learn the lesson.

This is the path of conscious competence. It’s downside is that you have to notice that you’re messing up before you can fix it. At first, it is very tough and prone to missing entire events. Don’t beat yourself up over that too! Again, patience with yourself is important.

You might want to try to find ways to short-circuit irritability with yourself. Please grab your paper and write down situations when you tend to loose patience with yourself. When you have a dozen or so (just kidding, a little), look over the list. Is there a pattern or grouping to them? We look for these patterns so we can fix the one thing in common, and help solve several problems at once.

I tended to get aggravated when I missed deadlines, or when I was late. Both were based to not being on time. Both can be helped immensely by starting a little earlier. What can you do to help yourself be easier on yourself by not even getting mad at yourself in the first place? Was that as confusing to read as it was to write?

It might even be as simple as re-wiring yourself to show patience with yourself as the default response to messing up. How would that change your life? Would you be able to better handle your negative thoughts and emotions? Next time you start to get mad with yourself, put your anger in a ‘time out’ and take a deep breath. If you have a calming or centering method, this would be a good time to use a short version of it.

Now, before you let anger back out of the corner, assess the situation and your level of responsibility. Then come up with a couple of ideas on how to not mess up that way again for you to explore later. Now check the corner again. Is anger even there anymore, or has your patience with yourself caused it to disappear? At the least, it should be smaller and easier to handle.

Negative thoughts and emotions will be with us as long as we are human. How you react to them is what will determine your quality of life. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. After all, you’re only human.

From: Twitter, @DalaiLama
confirmed at : it’s his own feed…

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The first and greatest punishment…

The first and greatest punishment of the sinner is the conscience of sin. – Seneca

What does that mean?
This talks of conscience and the feeling of guilt. When you come home and the dog has been on the couch, the dog usually has a really long face and a submissive/guilty demeanor, as it knows it wasn’t supposed to be there (there are exceptions, of course).

In humans, I think Edgar Allen Poe explained it best in the short story “The Tell-Tale Heart“. In this story, the perpetrator of a crime is haunted by what he has done, until he is practically driven insane by the guilt and calls the police to confess his crime. Well, Poe tells it far more eloquently than I just did, but there’s a much better synopsis at the other end of the link, above.

Why is having a conscience important? Continue reading

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We can have more than we’ve got…

We can have more than we’ve got because we can become more than we are. – Jim Rohn

What does that mean?
To me, this speaks of growth. As we grow, we become more than we are (or were, to be more precise). As we become more, we can do more, and we can have more because of that.

Look at a career. You start in the mail room (or washing dishes, if you prefer restaurants to the shirt-n-tie of the business route). Then, as you grow in understanding of the business, you are given more responsibilities and more opportunities, which lead to more growth. You started at minimum wage, and a quick twenty some years later, you run the place, pulling down the kind of cash the teenage version of you couldn’t even have dreamed of.

Why is growth important?
It has been said that you are either growing, or you are dying. I’ve made my choice, how about you? But seriously, are you done growing? Do you have all that you want, all the things, all the people, all the skills, all the knowledge, everything? Are you just going to sit there and wait for death to claim you? We’re all still growing. Just by learning from a mistake, our knowledge and skill base has grown, right?

Growth comes in many forms, and most people think of kids and physical growth. My kids have three separate steps in each cycle of growth: intellectual, emotional and physical. They’ll go through a phase where ideas and concepts that they were struggling with for weeks just click and then the next dozen concepts make sense within days. Then they go through an emotional growth stage, learning more about themselves and how their emotions work (or don’t). Then they start eating everything that isn’t nailed down (and if they can pry it loose, it wasn’t nailed down!) and do the physical growing.

Do you have growth patterns? Can you read and pick up new ideas (intellectual growth) for days and weeks and months on end? Or do you burn out and have to take some time growing in a different area of your life? As an engineer, I am always learning. Technical journals, seminars, books, seminars and more. And that’s just for work! I also mix in martial arts (growing towards some semblance of coordination and grace), wood working, modifying of just about anything I think needs improvement and whatever else comes my way. I also put time into growing as a husband and as a parent (two of my most important jobs). How about you, do you have a growth plan, a personal development plan, or are you drifting through life?

Where can I apply this in my life?
When I first heard this quote, it sounded very consumer oriented. I thought, “Well, yeah. I’ve now got a bigger garage, so now I got more stuff than I used to!” But on closer examination, if what you want to get is knowledge, you can have more knowledge than you have now because you can grow and be more than you are now.  If you want more friends than you have now, you can grow and become more friendly (and likable) than you are now. It actually is worded in a rather universal way.

The change in me came at work. They had a meeting for a Personal Development Plan. It was the company trying to help us become better employees (and hopefully more likely to stay with them). We talked about what our career goals were five and even ten years down the road.

It was, to me, a novel concept – setting a direction for my life that was farther away than the next road trip. And it was focused on growth, and it was being planned out. Hmmmm, I said to myself. This sounds interesting. Is this something that could be useful in my life? In case you hadn’t guessed, the answer is yes.

Grab that piece of paper and start writing down all the areas of your life where you are done growing, you have all you are ever going to need already. Now, for the longer list: the things you know you want to improve, the places where you already know that you need to grow.

Depending on how you group things, you might have  several personal categories, professional, social, intellectual, hobby or other categories where you want (or need) to grow. Choose one category and select one of the aspects that you wish to work on growth in.

We’ve done this before, but let’s brainstorm all the different ways we can get growth or gain knowledge. Are there books that might help? Classes at the local Community College, private school or from a local expert? Do you have a friend or know of a club that does what you want to grow better at doing?

As an example, I needed to be more physically active, and chose Martial Arts as a venue to work on growth in strength, coordination, grace and stamina. I could have done it by books, by DVD’s, over the internet or remotely (send in video tapes). Being kind of old school, I found a Dojo and learned directly from a master.

Look at your options (you can open another window and search for resources if you want). Now determine your budget in terms of cash and time. What is the best fit of your desires and budget? Life can be tough sometimes, with champagne tastes and a beer budget. But you have to make it fit in with your life and lifestyle, so something has to give. The details you will have to work out, of course.

You can repeat this for any of the other items in any of the categories you have on your list.  Some might not be immediate, you might want to revisit this list in late December, to help map out what you are going to be doing for the next year. Or, if your years are measured from September to May, you might want to start looking at the list each summer. Keeping the list might also prove to be humorous in a few years, when you realize that you already learned some of those things, and others were just fads. How many of you are old enough to have taken Disco lessons?

Whatever you are going to do with your life, put aside a little time to grow, to become more than you are. If you think life isn’t that great now, just think of how much better it could be. If you think life is already great, just imagine how much better it could be.

From: Twitter, @tonyrobbins
confirmed at : http://selfsuccessmastery.com/quotes-to-live-by/  – the last quote in his section

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Make your life a mission…

Make your life a mission, not an intermission! – Arnold H. Glasgow also seen spelled as Glasow

What does that mean?
If someone were to demand to know what you life’s mission was, could you tell them?  Right now, I’d be hard pressed, although I have the usual list of roles I fulfill and tasks I do which define my existence.  But that’s not quite the same.

Some people spend their life waiting, doing a little here, a little there, but never doing much (the intermission referenced in the quote, by my reckoning).  Others are feverishly running around, doing busy-work, without an overarching plan or mission to guide them (me, most of the time).  Others, a rare few in my observation, are on a mission.  They know what they want to do and they are doing things they think will move their mission along.

The first group is not of much interest to anyone. The second group needs some introspection and planning, and the third, that’s where we want to be, isn’t it? To which of the groups above do you most regularly fall?

Why is being on a mission important?
Being on a mission – sounds like the start to a movie, doesn’t it?  The line has been used in everything from the Blues Brothers to the Mission Impossible franchise, and many movies in-between. Being on a mission is having a goal that is an unquenchable desire. But one must be careful what one takes on as a mission.

Name any great tyrant in history, and you have a person with a mission. From Hitler to Idi Amin, they had a mission. Usually it was amassing personal power, wealth and prestige, cloaked in claim that they were helping the common folk achieve those same things.

Many on the fringes of religion suffer from the same kind of mission, and usually fare no better. From Rev Jim Jones to Marshall Applewhite, the trail of carnage and suffering is astounding.

I started with the scary side of missions to make sure that you harness your passion and set your goals in a proper manner.  As I have mentioned before, Mother Teresa was also a person with a mission. So was General Dwight D Eisenhower. While on opposite sides of the war/peace debate, both of their missions were the passion of their lives, an unquenchable desire to achieve a goal.

These are the kinds of passionate and motivated people who make a difference in the world, and do so on an international scale.  Being on a mission doesn’t have to be quite that big, though. There are plenty of people on a mission, just on smaller scales. Some fight corruption, some fight pollution, some fight crime (not Batman, but neighborhood watches, the Guardian Angles and similar groups), others fight hunger through dozens of different organizations both national and local.

Where can I apply this in my life?
I have covered passion and exceptionalism , both the definition of and exercises in finding them, in prior posts. Feel free to follow the links and examine some of my ideas on those topics. However, this post is about defining a mission.  I will presume you have a plan for becoming exceptional at what you are going to do.  I also presume you know what your passion is.

Now for the mission. You have a passion. You want to do something and really, absolutely have to do something about it. You also have some idea on how to get more skilled at whatever you are going to be doing. Now, to tie it all together.

Time for the paper, the writing and the brainstorm. Run through what you want to achieve, and write down what the major steps are. Now, time to use your intelligence (you don’t want to reinvent the wheel, do you?). What of those steps are already in place? Perhaps all of them are, and all you need to do is help coordinate? Who knows, but you’re going to find out!  Write it down and look into it.

If you want to feed the hungry, you need to decide where you will do it. Is there a particular group you are trying to reach? What services are presently available? You may find that there are plenty of services, but that there is a lack of methods to get people and food together. Can you be passionate about driving a glorified catering truck through the suburbs, delivering food to the elderly and to shut-ins? That’s what my mom does as part of Meals On Wheels. And it helps to feed people who otherwise might not eat as often or as well as they should.

How did your brainstorming session go? Did you find a niche, or are things already pretty well covered? Do you have to be a pioneer, or do you feel comfortable doing what you are passionate about within the structure of an existing organization? I have spoken about my passion for working with my hands, and with wood in particular. I also like the thought of helping with housing for the poor or disadvantaged. That led me to working with Habitat for Humanity for a while. I would never be able to rehab or build a house by myself, so working with an established organization was a good match for me.

Whatever path your mission takes you on, take some time to plan it out.  Passionate people have plenty of thrust, but can sometimes be lacking in vector. That’s geek speak for someone who has tons of energy, but is having trouble directing it in a coherent manner. Sometimes that takes the form of running helter-skelter from one aspect of a project to another, and other times it might take the form of laser sharp focus on one portion while ignoring another portion. Having a plan, and deadlines, help keep you focused on what is important.

If you’re going to be part of a larger organization, be sure to let them know what you like doing best and what you do the best.  You will still probably have enough to do to keep you running non-stop, as most groups are short handed. But you’ll be busy doing something you feel very passionate about, and you’re on a mission.

From: Twitter, @AR_Foundation
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/a/arnoldhgl144778.html

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…success without happiness is…

When all is said and done, success without happiness is the worst kind of failure. – Rabbi Louis Binstock (lots of quotes, hardly any bio info – any ideas?)

What does that mean?
Can you be successful and miserable at the same time?  Oh yeah!  Not fun at all.  What good is all the success in the world if you are unhappy?  On the other hand, if you aren’t happy, can you even count what you have as a success, or is it more accurately labeled as a failure?

Looking at it another way, I would associate success with being happy, and associate failure with being unhappy.  Can you define success without happiness?  I have tried and cannot do it without tying words into knots trying to dance around the “h” word.  So success without happiness isn’t really success, but is instead, failure.  Just look at all the musicians who took themselves out when at the top of their game – fame, fortune, fans & world tours; but no happiness.

Why is happiness important?
Happiness is pretty much the reward, the motivation, for humans.  We strive to be happy and do the things we think and hope will bring it to us.  Some of these things are impressed on us by society (whether it’s based on parental teachings, religion, societal norms or advertisements), and others are self directed.  I’m sure you know, as I do, people who went their own way to look for happiness, going against their parents, religion, society and rejecting the standard consumerism of the day.  You might even know one or two who found happiness, by their definition.

What constitutes “happiness” is different for each person.  That’s part of why a “happy marriage” is so rare, especially after you add kids into the mix.  However, happiness is always available, even if you are having trouble finding it. The problem, I’m afraid, is on the human side. Happiness is a state of mind, and we, the human, choose to either be in a state of happiness or to be somewhere else.

Where can I apply this in my life?
The definition of happiness is as individual as the definition of beauty, and relies on many of the same foundations.  In America, there’s the American Dream, with 2 cars, 2 kids, a dog, a white picket fenced house in the suburbs with big trees and extra-green grass.  Or at least it was in the 50’s.  As time changes, society changes, and so does the definition of happiness.

Many people’s happiness is combined with their religious beliefs (or lack thereof) and their world view.  And it will likely change over the years.  Happiness is being single.  Happiness is being a couple.  Happiness is having a house full of little ones.  Happiness is seeing them off, on their own, and having the house back.

But as long as we look to things outside of ourselves, we will never be truly happy.  We may touch happiness for a brief time, but even that will fade if it comes from without.  As the shiny new toy becomes dull, so does the happiness it brought.  Whether it’s a car, a friend, a tech-toy or whatever, it won’t make you happy forever.  Some people go through boy-friends (or girl-friends) for just that reason.  Others turn to chemicals to provide the feeling of happiness, but that doesn’t last either.

Where do we find our own happiness, then?  Get out the paper and make a list of the 10 happiest times in you life (10 or more, in no particular order).  Leave some space by each one, because each will be examined in some detail.

For each item on your list put down why it made you happy.  If it was the birth of a child, why was that a happy moment?  Were you happy as the parent, happy to be un-pregnant, happy for the baby, happy to have an addition to the family, happy they were healthy, or were you happy because you were expected to be happy?

Now examine your answers and make sure they are more than one word.  At least make them a complete sentence, presuming it starts with “__event__ made me happy because…”.  Do you see a pattern?  Are most of the events external?  Many will be, but is your reason for being happy also external or is it internal?  Having a baby (speaking as a father) is an external event, but being happy because I have a new lifelong connection is an internal feeling.  Graduation is an external event, but being happy about the accomplishment is an internal feeling.

Go back through your list and see if there are internal reasons for the things that made you happy.  Most of us could probably give a few different reasons any one event made us happy.  But if you first thought for every single one was related to it’s new-ness or shiny-ness, then you may have an external fixation for your source of happiness.

If that is the case, I would look through the revised list and look for a pattern in the internal happiness references.  Is there a common thread through some of them?  Things like service to others, helping, accomplishing, teaching, just to name a few, can help you find a pattern to help you plan a happier life.

Whatever it is that helps you find happiness, do it more often.  Find ways to be involved with groups of people that allow you to exercise your skills to help you be happier.  If pounding nails makes you happy, it can be a hobby or a profession.  You could also volunteer to help fix up houses for those who can’t, or even help with scratch builds with groups like Habitat for Humanity.

Success is no more permanent than failure, and they are both impostors.  Both of them are simply outcomes of events – no different other than the label we place on them, based on our preferences for the outcome.  Learn to place your happiness inside of yourself, in things you can control, and you will have happiness at your fingertips for the rest of your life.

From: Twitter, @GreatestQuotes
confirmed at : http://www.iwise.com/QA4TP

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It is the nature of every person to…

It is the nature of every person to error, but only the fool perseveres in error. – Marcus Tullius Cicero

What does that mean?
It says that we all screw up from time to time, it’s part of human nature.  Know it, and get over it, move past the error and try again until you get it right.  It also says that only a fool would persevere in making an error, which is to do it over and over again, expecting a better result (Einstein had a quote about that – you can look that one up yourself).

I have also heard it said that there are so many interesting ways to mess things up, why do the same one over and over again? That would be so boring! This is also similar to the quote by the Dalai Lama on intelligence and courage.  Once you notice it’s not working, only a fool would try to do it the same way again.  You need to be creative and come up with another way to mess up and keep messing up until you get it right (Edison said something like that – I might get to that one eventually).

Why is creativity important?
Without creativity, life would be pretty boring, wouldn’t it?  I know my life would be painfully boring without it.  Most people think of software geeks as being pretty square (except, perhaps, while they are gaming), but most software types are actually incredibly creative. The problems that they solve are never quite the same twice.  Yes, some stuff (file input and output, database, sorting, blah blah blah) is at least somewhat similar, but those functions are available in libraries, they get used without much modification or creativity.  The core of the problem, on the other hand, is unique in many ways.  For each project, it requires creativity and team effort to work out the quickest, most efficient way through the maze (why? to get to the cheese, of course).

Parents are also masters of creativity, even if they don’t give themselves credit.  How many of you who now have kids can remember a time when you looked at a parent that distracted and calmed a little one who was mere moments ago throwing a tantrum to end the world and wondered “How on Earth did they do that?”  Now you know.  For those who haven’t had kids, you probably wonder how they deal with the kids when they’re teething, during the terrible twos and even the fearsome teenage years.  Creativity is learned, out of necessity if for no other reason.

And how many of you like having a friend around who is naturally creative, and can come up with really useful ideas seemingly out of thin air?  I know that I like that kind of person, but I’m there to pick their brain.  I want to find out how they came up with an idea so that I can try to use some of their methods and techniques to become more creative myself.

Where can I apply this in my life?
In a post about creativity, what are the odds that I would be stuck for an idea on how to move forward at this point?  But to me, the word “stuck” is a challenge word.  As soon as I say it, I must move past it. So, let’s use an old standby (if you’ve been following this blog for any length of time you know what’s coming…) – I’ll grab paper and start brainstorming for ideas.  OK, I’m back. Here we go!

To me, brainstorming is just what it sounds like, a thunderstorm of activity in the cranial cavity.  Swirling winds, driving rain of tiny ideas splattering all over the place, punctuated with blinding lightning strikes followed by the explosion of thunder!  It almost sounds exciting when put that way, doesn’t it?

There are other ways to be creative, but getting a creative person to explain how they get ideas is very similar to getting a three year old to explain how the cookie jar became empty.  It just happens, without any real thought.  They’re just sitting there, minding their own business and poof, it happens.  If you have a method, please feel free to share it, it just might be the spark someone else needs, and you can feel good about contributing.

Creativity is part gift, and a very large part training.  Like any other skill, you have to work at it to get better. So I use brainstorming, a technique I learned ages ago, and have been practicing almost as long. It is just jumbling ideas around in my mind and seeing what bumps into each-other.  Probably 90% of the ideas are so goofy I don’t even write them down, but after a while, you get a few ideas on paper.

Evaluate the ideas and look for ways to improve them.  Eventually you will get a new way (or perhaps many more ways) to try to move forward, and to avoid repeating the error.  Try the idea(s) and find ways to improve them.  If they don’t work out, abandon them (only a fool would continue to do it again and again without trying to improve them), and try another.  When the list is exhausted, it’s time for a new list of ideas.  Repeat until you win, making as many errors in the process as necessary to accomplish the task before you.

Just make sure that each mistake is a new one, alright?

From: Twitter, @philo_quotes
confirmed at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marcustull156305.html

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Any man may easily do harm…

Any man may easily do harm, but not every man can do good to another. – Plato

What does that mean?
Well, I’m afraid I have to disagree slightly with him.  It’s a quibble, but :  Anyone CAN do good.  Many will choose not to do good, but they have the capability to do good.

That aside, this reminds me of how fragile humans can be.  As a mediocre martial artist, we train with each other, striving to NOT hurt each other, as we learn our techniques.  This also applies to the emotional damage that can be dished out by careless or vicious people.  Many people make it their job to injure or mangle people, body, mind and spirit.

And I’m not talking about the military, it’s in their job description.

Why is doing good to others important?
Have you ever had a stranger do something good for you?  I know I have.  Those moments, most now quite some time ago, are some of the most special moments of my life. Someone else thought so much of me that they took the time and effort, as well as the initiative, to do something for me.  Now, I try to do it for others.  And the times when I have stayed around long enough to see the results and reactions, they have been overwhelming for them and for me.

The main reason I feel that doing good for others is that it opens a part of you that most of us don’t know we have.  The feeling of appreciation from the person you helped is nice, but the feeling of having helped another human, to have eased their mind, lightened their load or given them a hand up when they were down, that’s where the real reward is. If you haven’t done it, I wouldn’t be able to describe it.  If you have done it, I don’t need to describe it.  It’s just that simple.  You’ve got to do it.

Where can I apply this in my life?
I try to do good when I can. As a former Boy Scout, it’s kind of part of me. There are plenty of ways to do good, and I will go over a few of my preferred methods below. Don’t fret if none of these appeal to you, there is always your trusty piece of paper to brainstorm and write down ideas if none of these appeal to you.

I would start with forgiveness and forgive your friends and family.  It doesn’t matter if they don’t forgive you, someone has to take the first step, and up to this point, that probably hasn’t happened, right? Even if it doesn’t really change anything on their end, you will find that things have changed on your end. Just remember, not everyone knows how to put past hurt behind them and move forward.  From their viewpoint, you might just be leading by example.

I would also be sure to contribute, or provide service to others.  There is always room for monetary contributions, but I prefer the hands on approach.  I donate blood, help out at the local food bank, volunteer at my kid’s school and do many other little things throughout the year.  I have friends who help out at their local airport and help people find their destinations, gates and other necessities. Others help with volunteer work directing traffic and crowd control at local events.

There is always a need for compassion and for kindness in this world. Even something as simple as making the decision to hold one door open for another every day will make a difference in someone’s life.  Add the decision to smile at at least three people each day and to say “thank you” as often as possible and you will be making a big difference.  All the little things add up. And remember, everyone is having some troubles, so have some compassion if someone is a jerk.  Perhaps you remind them of their Ex!

One of the easiest for me is to show strength.  I have a bit of physical strength, but that’s not what I mean here.  To me, showing strength in this sense means to do the right thing. Even if no one is watching. But most of the time, people are watching, you just don’t know it. Live your life as an example of doing good.

Things have a way of coming back around, so make sure it’s something you’re going to want to have some more of.

From: Twitter, @philo_quotes
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/p/plato396486.html

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According to my own experience…

According to my own experience, the highest level of inner calm comes from the development of love and compassion. – Dalai Lama

What does that mean?
The full quote is as follows:

According to my own experience, the highest level of inner calm comes from the development of love and compassion. The more concerned we are with the happiness of others, the more we increase our own well-being. Friendliness and warmth towards others allow us to relax and help us to dispel any sense of fear or insecurity so we can overcome whatever obstacles we face.

To me, this speaks to the deeper nature of humans.  So often we focus on the vicious and nasty side of humanity.  This saying points us in a better direction, towards a way of releasing our better selves.  By being concerned with others’ happiness and by being friendly and warm towards others, we become better as people.  The actions also help us relax the tension between us and others, assuaging their (and our) insecurities and fears.  This assists them in becoming better as people.  Then we can, together, better handle whatever life sends our way.

Or, in a somewhat shorter form: By not being overly excitable and also by being likable, we can better help others feel less threatened, helping all of us cooperate better and tackle life’s little problems.

Why is inner calm important?
We’ve all seen people who are so energetic that you wonder if they bleed coffee when they get a cut.  We have also seen the people who ‘fly off the handle’ or give very strong emotional responses to (what appears to us to be) the slightest provocation.  These are counter-examples for inner calm.  Would either of the people I just described be very well suited to to helping others feel less threatened or more welcome, as a precursor to winning them over and convincing them to cooperate in solving the problems facing the world?  I don’t think so.

Inner calm, to some, is to be the rock by the shore against which the waves break.  Immovable, unconcerned, unflappable.  I think that’s all wet.  To me, inner calm means having a center, a balance point.  As you stand still, you’re not perfectly balanced.  If you are outside, you also have to deal with the wind pushing you as it blows past.  You are close to the center, but usually off by just a bit, first this way and then that way.  Similarly, if you are walking or running, you are wobbling around, with your physical sense of balance just a little to this side of center, a little ahead of center, back and forth, side to side.  On average, you are centered, or you would eventually fall over, but you are staying within a small radius of your physical balance center.

Where can I apply this in my life?
To me, inner calm is the goal, the place I try to be.  Be as close to center as appropriate for the situation.  You will be straying away from your energy and emotional centers when watching “the big game,” right?  But if you aren’t into whatever was on the TV when you walked into a room, you’re probably going to be a whole lot closer to your emotional and energy centers.  If you are enthusiastically playing a sport, you will be going well beyond your physical balancing center as you maneuver, right?  But if you’re sitting quietly and listening to music or reading a book, you’re probably staying very close to your physical balance center.

Would either of the people discussed above (the ‘busy bee’ and the ‘fly off the handle’) spend much time near their centers, or would they be moving erratically and rapidly in many different directions?  That’s pretty much the antithesis of inner calm, isn’t it?

To help with being calm, I created an anchor (a NLP anchoring technique, similar to Pavlov and how he trained his dogs).  I went through my mind for the time I was the most calm ever in my life.  I came up with being on a wooden sailing ship, with a fresh breeze, rising to meet each new wave, the creaking of the boat, all the details.  Colors, smells, sounds, feelings, sensations, and most importantly, the inner calm.  I then chose a motion that reminded me of that situation and associated the two to each other.  I would work really hard at being calm, then repeat the motion.  Again and again, until now, when I make the motion, I calm myself down.  And drool a little.

When were you the most calm, the most at peace, in your life?  Grab a paper & writing implement and write down everything you can remember that was part of the scene.  What did you see?  What did you hear?  What did you physically feel (touch, motions, …)?  What scents were present?  Were there tastes associated with it as well?  What was going through your mind?  By writing all this down, you can better remember it, and remember it again and again.  Find a motion that reminds you of this and, when in as relaxed a state as you can muster, do it, feel it and be it.  Repeat until the motion brings a noticeable expression of calmness when you are in an other-than-calm condition.  Now you have started down the path.  More practice will bring you closer still until inner calm is your preferred state of mind, your default position.

That was one way to help find inner calm.  Another is to map out your pathways to agitated states of mind and put up road blocks.  If you fly off the handle a lot, perhaps you can feel the building up before you blow.  Consider how you can derail or release the pressure.  Can you come up with a gesture or word/phrase to let people know you need some space to calm down?  Can you visualize the pain you will cause by flying off the handle, and use that to help damp down the pressure?  These are just a few ideas for one specific path away from inner calm.  You will have to brainstorm ideas that work for you and fit your paths.  And then plan how to habituate them and make them part of you.

The biggest thing to remember is repetition is the mother of skill.  Whatever you think, whatever you do, if you do it regularly, that is what you will become.  You are training your mind, and like training your body, you have to do it over and over and over until it becomes automatic.  When your first reaction is to explode, you will explode.  When you have worked on inner calm enough that it is your preferred path, you will explode less and less.

That’s where I am, and where I will stay, at least until the first time my daughter breaks curfew.  Somehow, I believe I will fly off the handle just a little bit. 8)

From: Twitter, @DalaiLama
confirmed at : it’s his own feed…  but also at facebook :  http://www.facebook.com/DalaiLama/posts/176676835680468

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Travel and change of place…

Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind.Seneca

What does that mean?
For me, it’s the Vacation Mantra!  If you get a chance to get out of town, don’t you feel better?  Do you feel refreshed, reinvigorated, and ready to get back to it when you return?  Does remembering a recent vacation or trip get you feeling a little bit refreshed?  That’s what it does for me.

The vigor of the mind also applies when you see spectacular things while away.  Whether it’s art, architecture, mountains’ majesty, forests of unfamiliar trees (oak, aspen, pine, maple, or…) or other wondrous sights, it is refreshing, wondrous and mind expanding.  At least it has been for me.

Why is being refreshed important?
There is an old saying about a woodsman taking time to sharpen his axe before going to work.  You are only as good as your tools, and for most of us, our mind is a fairly useful tool.  Without refreshing it, or “impart new vigor” per the translation, your mind, like the axe, becomes dull.

Besides the problems general of being dull, a dull tool will not do the work it was intended to do with the same speed, accuracy and effort as a sharp tool.  Having a dull mind can lead to many problems besides not thinking as sharply or as quickly as you might otherwise be able to accomplish.  It might also slow you down, or cause you to overlook things that would otherwise be obvious, leading to real problems.

Refreshing you mind is a way to help clear the cobwebs and set aside the distractions of daily life.  It can be a ‘vacation of the mind’ for a few seconds, or a full blown trip to a tropical paradise (unless that’s your locale, in which case perhaps a mountain retreat is more for you).

Where can I apply this in my life?
How many of you have ever felt “brain dead,” having difficulty thinking clearly, or feeling thick, wooden or just plain ‘out of it’?  I’m not talking being on mind altering substances, just seriously tired, fatigued, sick or otherwise distracted.  Even something as simple as “spring fever” or “senior-itis” (High School, not really REALLY old) can qualify.

For me, true vacations to fantastic destinations aren’t in the budget.  So I take brief “sharpen the axe” vacations in my mind when I’m feeling a bit sluggish.  I remember some of the past blow-out vacations, like Maui for our honeymoon, or two weeks in the UK for our 15th anniversary.  Just five minutes of recollection can really blow out the cobwebs and impart new vigor to the mind, to quote some old guy.

I presume if you have had a fun vacation that you can remember the more interesting portions without much prompting from me.  But what if you haven’t been able to save up for even one blow-out vacation yet?

That’s where movies, documentaries on TV or even TV shows come in.  Why do you think most TV shows are set in exciting cities (Fargo being an exception)?  Las Vegas, New York City, Chicago, and Hawaii are just some of the sites.  You can use them to imagine you are there.

Pirate movies tend to visit rustic looking parts of the Caribbean.  Space movies can be set anywhere and any-when, so that can be an interesting bit of fuel for the imagination. Romance movies can be set almost anywhere and any-when (especially if it’s fantasy based), and historically based movies can have even more flavor.

Documentaries can be of places literally anywhere in the world, so that too can be used to help with the short mental vacations.  I’ve been impressed with some of the wildlife documentaries on Africa that I have seen over the decades, and it’s on my bucket list (to go there and see the animals).  I have also seen documentaries on Everest, Deep Sea Creatures, jungles full of bugs and swamps full of toothy creatures.  Not going to go there, but it is interesting to watch.

How about you, what are your favorite locations?  Have you taken a few short mental vacations just reading these ideas?  I hope so, that’s the whole point.  Another possibility is to keep an eye out for themed parties.  Can’t get to Rio for Carnival?  There are parties each year, from mild to wild, and one might be near you.  Can’t get to the beach?  Each spring hundreds of places have their own spring break with a couple of truckloads of sand in the parking lot and deck chairs, and will be happy to provide you with a tropical drink (for a nominal fee).  Yeah, it’s not the same but it costs a lot less, and sometimes it’s the best my budget can handle.

Take some time this week and refresh yourself.  Perhaps next weekend you can take part of a day and watch a favorite movie or two and let yourself be transported to someplace else.  Change your place, even if you never leave the couch.  Refresh and relax.  Then be ready to hit life hard when you ‘get back’ from your travels.

From: Twitter, @thezenmama
confirmed at : http://matadornetwork.com/bnt/50-most-inspiring-travel-quotes-of-all-time/ – It is number 40 on the list.

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If you don’t risk anything…

If you don’t risk anything, you risk even more.Erica Jong

What does that mean?
Those who are too afraid to to do anything for fear of failure (or embarrassment or whatever else they fear), have lost not only the opportunity for failure, but any possibility of success, no matter how limited it might have been.

This is a fairly standard for fear or risk aversion.  There is an attempt to limit the damage that could possibly be caused, everything that could possibly prove to be useful is prevented from happening as well.

Why is risk important?
Some would say that there is no such thing as a “sure thing.”  I would tend to agree, if only from a mathematical point of view.  Nothing is going to be 100% sure.  I would argue that there are going to be things that come very close to 100% sure, so close as to be indistinguishable by mere mortals.  A few posts back, I spoke of being sure how my then fiancée would answer “the question” before I asked it.  However, being human, I might have misunderstood her signals and blown it massively.  Ya never know until ya try!

In the “ask her to marry me” scenario, what happens if I didn’t take the risk?  If I didn’t ask her?  There is a chance, given today’s modern woman, that she would have asked me (or at least bludgeoned me over the head with clues until she knocked some sense into me).  There was also the chance that the question would never have been asked, and we would have drifted apart, as people are wont to do.  If I hadn’t risked the possibility of a ‘no’, I would likely never have had a chance for a ‘yes.’

If I never had cranked up the courage to start this blog, we never would have met, and we both would have had to find other ways to occupy our time.  But I took a chance, put my writing, thinking and editing skills (such as they are) to the test.  Does that help it make more sense?

Where can I apply this in my life?
If you have kids, you know how persistent they can be.  “Daddy, can I have…” can be repeated easily five times in a minute, even though each was responded to clearly with a NO!  They are willing to risk the rejection if they think there is even the tiniest chance of success.

As adults, it tends to be the reverse.  We sit, waiting, afraid to move forward unless we are sure that there is only the tiniest chance of failure (or embarrassment or whatever it is we are trying to avoid). Isn’t that kind of sad?  We could learn a useful lesson from little kids.  They are willing to risk, repeatedly, in order for a chance of success.

Grab your paper & write down a couple of things you are frozen out on, things where you aren’t moving forward due to fear or uncertainty or whatever else it might be. Can any of the items be broken down into parts that can move forward and other parts that are stuck?  If so, you have already made progress!

For me, I was frozen on my old car, not sure how to proceed with getting the title issue cleared up.  In this case, the fear was the car would not be title-able and I would have to sell it for scrap.  That possibility had me frozen on doing anything.  Then I got my self   straightened out and got the preliminary paperwork figured out.  I still have to get it all notarized, but the path is now clear.  I risked the car and all the work I did on it, to find out what could be done.

Now, I’m as risk adverse as anyone out there, perhaps more so.  I help myself deal with this by being more certain of the result.  Take a look at your list and try to find a pattern.  For me, it was usually a fear of an unknown outcome, so I did research, asked questions, found people who could help (or at least point me in the correct direction).  What will help you mitigate or reduce the risks you are afraid or reluctant to take?  Take a little time to brainstorm and see what you can come up with for ideas.

Look though your ideas and see how each might apply to your list items.  Not every idea will fit every situation, so having some options would be a good idea.  Hopefully, you now have some ideas on how to move forward, at least a little, with some of your list items.  Now all you need to do is to take action.  Get busy, what are you waiting for?  “nothing ventured, nothing gained”

From: Twitter, @Inspire_Us
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/ericajong124695.html

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I never wanted to be the next…

I never wanted to be the next Bruce Lee. I just wanted to be the first Jackie Chan.Jackie Chan

What does that mean?
This speaks to me of the challenge of being an original in a world full of pigeon holes.  Asian martial artist, that must be the next Bruce Lee.  Black guy on guitar, that must be the next Jimi Hendrix.  And how many careers were ruined with the label of “the next Bob Dylan”?

Can’t anyone just be themselves anymore?  A lot of that has to do with marketing, but it also has a lot to do with the human brain and how it stores information.  It is easier to remember someone if we associate them with an established person than it is to keep track of everyone as an individual.  I use this trick to remember a new person’s name, associating their face with a face I remember the name of, and by association, the new person’s name as well.

Why is originality important?
It also shows up in families.  How many of you have heard, or worse yet, said “Why can’t you be more like (someone else)?”  It can be to a friend, a family member, or worse yet, one of your kids (and referring to another one of your kids), but the result is the same.  Aren’t you telling them that they aren’t as good as the other person, that they would have more value if they were more like some one else, and less like them selves?  Ouch.

Originality is the ability to see what everyone else sees, but find something new or different.  To see the notes, but hear the music.  To see the painting, but feel the emotion within it.  Yes, those are trivial examples, but I’m trying to find things that most of you will recognize and be able to understand.

An original design would be the Edsel.  Might not have been the prettiest car, even by the gaudy styles of the day, but it was definitely original.  Might have sold better if it looked more like a Ford, right?

In the corporate world, as shown in the classic Apple ad, originality is often frowned on, even to the point of being a firing offense.  It’s the same in Hollywood.  You’re an Action type, a Drama type or a Comedy type, and you’re not allowed to cross over.  How well have any of the Arnold Schwarzenegger comedy movies done? Yes, he did several, I can think of three without looking it up.  Can you name one?  But you can name a dozen or so action flicks, right?

So Jackie’s problem was carving out some space to be himself, to be something other than Bruce Lee.  Jackie has (from what I can tell from watching both of their movies) a very different approach to life and to film making than did Bruce.  So Jackie probably disappointed some people, who probably said that the movie would have been better if he had been more like Bruce Lee.  Big deal.  Now everyone knows what they’re going to get in a Jackie Chan movie, and looks forward to his unique, original style.

Where can I apply this in my life?
If you have any hangups on being more like someone else, please stop.  Be yourself.  That doesn’t mean that you can’t become a better you by taking on some attributes of some one else.  I would love to be a little more like Warren Buffett (finance, philanthropic), or Walter Payton (athletic, philanthropic) but that’s not likely to happen (because I’m not that gifted, nor will I be able to put in that kind of effort over a great number of years to achieve those results).  But I remain myself.  I try to become a better me by following a mentor, but not being part of the herd.  Does that make sense?

Yes, it’s a fine line between being yourself, no matter what, and finding qualities in others you wish to emulate.  But in that mix, there is originality.  Finding your own path is rarely easy.  That’s why we have categories for people who behave the same.  They do it because it’s easier to do what everyone else around them are doing, and they just follow the leader.

Most of us have at least a little more originality than that.  One of my favorite images is a cartoon of a bunch of lemmings heading into the water, but one is looking out of the screen with a smile and is wearing a life preserver.  If you have to follow the crowd, there is still a little room for originality.  A friend of mine, when forced to wear a suit, has a button with a rude or crass saying on it pinned to the back of the lapel.  Just to be a little different, to show some originality (although rarely show the button).

Not that anti-social buttons are the only way to go, but you have to find some kind of spark.  You don’t have to stand out, either.  Very few people know about the button under the lapel.  Just the having of the button is part of the spark.

What makes you different from your friends and your family?  If you tell good jokes, that doesn’t mean to be original you have to tell jokes all the time.  Just often enough that they don’t mistake you for your cousin.  Find little things you can do, collect or have that make you a little different.  In my cube at work, I have a couple different things (besides my kid’s artwork) to dress it up and make it unique in the office.  My cars have all had a custom touch, even if it was a chunk of sheet aluminum screwed on over a rust hole.

Yeah, I’m an original, how about you?  Now, I have to wonder, who is going to be the next Jackie Chan? 8)

From: Twitter, @GreatestQuotes
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/j/jackiechan410598.html

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If a man neglects education…

If a man neglects education, he walks lame to the end of his life.Plato

What does that mean?
One needs some knowledge of the world, if one is to prosper.  I take the term ‘Education’ as very broadly defined.  If you know very little, having quit school young.  If you never learned a trade, not being educated in a saleable skill.  If you never learned to feed yourself, by way of farming or the husbandry of animals.  How will you move forward through your life?  Plato says you might be able to, but you will progress as quickly down the road of prosperity as would a lame man walking down a road.

Why is education important?
That doesn’t sound like much fun, does it.  True, education usually isn’t that much fun, whether it’s under the foreman’s thumb, studying for a test, reading books, practicing your piano music (again) or digging in the dirt, but it beats the alternative.  The lack of education will haunt you later in life.

True, you can exist on minimum wage jobs, doing menial tasks, often physically difficult or harsh.  But what do you do when your back gives out, you are injured or unable to continue with the difficult task?  Ditch digging can pay the bills, but your back isn’t going to last forever.  Then what?

Education gives you more options.  Note that many people mistakenly believe that college is the only place to get an education.  Or a career.  Not true.  There are many old crafts, from masonry, carpentry and the like, to music and artistry, where the only way to truly be educated is from the tutelage of a master.  There are other ways to become educated as well, from online and computer courses, to book learning (which is where I got most of my car-fixing chops), to the old standby, practice (practice, practice, practice and a little more practice).

Where can I apply this in my life?
If you feel you are sufficiently educated, and will never need to learn anything again, I guess you’re done for the day.  See you tomorrow!

For the rest of us (and I include myself because I am insatiably curious by nature), grab a piece of paper and let’s start a list.  Come up with a couple things you want to learn more about.  It could be a possible career change, a way to improve your present career path, or a hobby that looks interesting.  It might even be something that’s been rolling around in the back of your head since childhood.

For each of the items on the list, take a few moments and look into them.  If you are considering a change in career, that’s going to take the most research, as it is a huge step, and one you probably can’t afford to mess up.  If you’re looking at learning something a bit lighter, like a new hobby, the research can probably be a bit quicker.

Research can start on the internet, and I would seriously consider finding books in the library you can check out, so you can dip a toe into the water before you make any massive commitments of time and money.  Does that make sense?  If you want to become a nurse or a nurse’s aid, will you need to handle blood?  If that makes you faint, you might want to consider a different new career.  If you’re looking at learning a new computer language to further your career, you might want to think twice before taking RPG, COBOL, or FORTRAN unless you are really sure that’s where you want to go.

Hobby material is everywhere, and you can find blogs about doing almost anything you can think of to do.  The trick with a hobby is most likely going to be the amount of time you’ll spend researching before you get busy having fun!

The computer can be a very valuable resource in learning, and shouldn’t be overlooked.  Use it to zero in on the items you are most interested in, and to eliminate the ideas that aren’t going to work for you.  Find people, businesses, training facilities or masters and call them, get information on how to proceed.  Find out what it’s going to take to complete what you want to learn.

But in the end, you have to actually do something.  Select one of the items on your list, one you really want to do, and take the first step.  Find a phone number and write it down, promise to call them in the morning (or call right now, depending on what time it is when you read this).  Send an e-mail, reserve a book at the library, or go down and pick it up!  Take that first step and begin the next stage of your education!

Life is a learning experience.  Even if all you do is learn from your mistakes, you are learning.  Learning valuable skills help you move forward in life, although life is more than just a climb to the top.  To me, the fun in life is largely centered around learning new skills, new ideas and then putting them into practice.  How about you, have you learned something today?

From: Twitter, @philo_quotes
confirmed at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/p/plato383526.html

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