Be kind to unkind people. They need it the most.

Be kind to unkind people. They need it the most. – Ashleigh Brilliant

Those who need it most, seem to get it least. Be kind to all, but especially to the unkind.

Those who need it most, seem to get it least. Be kind to all, but especially to the unkind.

What does that mean?
This quote is beautiful in the simplicity of it. We tend to be kind to those who are kind to us. That’s nice, but does it help those who are most in need of kindness?

But the people most in need of some kindness are those who seem strangers to it. The unkind are the ones most in need of kindness. Isn’t that your experience as well?

Whether it is to thaw their cold heart, or to provide an example of how it is to be done, the unkind need acts of kindness more so than those who are already kind.

That is the brutal and honest simplicity of the quote. We so rarely go out of our way to be kind to those most in need of our kindness, the unkind people of our world.

Why is being kind important?  
Kindness in general is one of the greatest friction reducer in the world. Kindness given and kindness received helps us fill up our reservoir with kindness which helps us react better to all that happens around us. However, for some reason, we seem to avoid the unkind people.

Some of us are unsure of our ability to be kind. Others may be concerned that the unkind person will deplete their reservoir of kindness, and that they will be left with less. A few just couldn’t be bothered to interact with those unkind people.

By being kind to others, we get nice things for ourselves, at least most of the time. Any time you interact with another, you have the choice to be kind, or to be something other than kind. What do you gain by being other than kind? What emotional need does it fill, and is that a worthy emotion?

On the other hand, what do you gain by being kind? What emotional need does that fill, and is that a worthy emotion? I hope you have a new perspective on kindness, and the usefulness thereof. Kindness isn’t a scarce resource, and there are plenty of people in need of some. Will you give it to them?

Where can I apply this in my life?
I believe we can all use, and give, a little more kindness. I believe it can be done anywhere in our lives. At the store, on the roads, at home, at work, in any and every situation. Even if you don’t think you have anything to gain from being kind, do it anyway, for the cost is negligible.

If we take the time to think about it, we have an unlimited well of kindness within ourselves. We can be kind to anyone, and not have any less to give to the next person. Yes, we can get tired of it. Yes, we can get bored with it. Yes, it can hurt if we expect something in return. But we still have more to give, if we so choose.

How many of the days you consider among the greatest have been without kindness, either given or received? Does that tell you how important kindness is to you? And would it be much of a stretch to consider that it is probably just as important to everyone in the world?

Yes, there are people who are not social creatures by nature. As a confirmed introvert of some repute, even I find kindness a necessary part of my life. Whether it is giving or receiving, kindness helps me feel better about life in general, and myself in specific.

We can start with the tiniest of kindnesses, thank-you and please. How often do you remember to use these words? How much effort does it take? How much time did it take? Are you exhausted from doing it? Did it cost you any money? Is there any less kindness in your reservoir? Can you come up with a single good reason not to be kind?

Start by practicing with those two magical words. When it becomes habit, when you find you are doing it without even thinking about it, think back to the time before, and see if you don’t feel better. The only question left is what will you do next?

How will you spread your kindness beyond simple words and start being kind in deed as well? You probably already are, but how can you take it to the next level? What actions can you take part in which result in kindness to others? Can you volunteer somewhere? Can you help out at a shelter?

Then there is always money. Some people have more time than money, others have the opposite problem. Sometimes, a great kindness can be done with donations to worthy causes. There are plenty of people in need, the question becomes which group best represents your values.

There are many ways to be kind, but don’t forget to be kind to those most in need, the unkind people. And don’t forget to be kind to yourself as well.

From: Twitter, @wellbelove
confirmed at :
Photo by Celestine Chua

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6 Responses to Be kind to unkind people. They need it the most.

  1. RITA 20 February 2016 at 5:23 pm #

    I was kind to my boyfriend and his attitude changed towards me. It’s good to be kind. I love him. God bless him.

    • philosiblog 29 February 2016 at 4:25 am #

      Thanks for stopping by and for leaving such a nice comment. It is nice to hear when a quote works out for someone in real life.

  2. madblog 28 January 2014 at 4:00 pm #

    43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[a] and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect”. Matthew 5: 43-48.

    Great post! Indeed we are called as human beings to be kind to those who are not kind to us.

    • philosiblog 31 January 2014 at 4:03 am #

      Thanks for the kind words. I’m glad you liked it. Thanks for stopping by.

  3. Ingrid Esther 26 November 2013 at 8:58 am #

    Dear K.C. King, thank you for posting this piece dealing with kindness. You are a great and to me important blogger. Also by using the same format each time. I like that.

    Kindness, I was born with it. Whenever I meet unkindness in life I react with kindness. But ofcourse not always!

    It’s also in my own interest to be kind, because I get more kindness back. I am in need of kindness.

    Sometimes when I meet people who are acting unkind, they are just really dumb. They hurt other people with dumbness. Then I help them by either neglecting their unkindness or say something intelligent back *using humor*, because saying/doing nothing may confirm them in their behaviour.

    People who are not so social can be the kindest people at the same time. They might be pulling themselves back from social enterprises because they get the (subjective) feeling that other people are unkind.

    Autistic people may look and act or behave unkind. In the book Working with Asperger’s of Rudy Simone it is said that a lack of eyecontact and for example the honesty of autistic people can give others the feeling the person is being unkind to them. Consequense may be that people dislike the person with autism and it can even lead to the loss of their precious job.

    I think I lost my job being way too kind though..

    Oh, dear, I can write on and on about the subject of (un)kindness.. I think it’s (a part of) my autistic obsession 🙂 I wish I could write about it every day and get paid for it 😉

    • philosiblog 26 November 2013 at 4:13 pm #

      Thanks for sharing your observations with the readers, I’m sure they will be useful to others.

      As for writing and getting paid, I’m half way there. 8) I don’t do this for money, which is good, as there is none. But instead, I write for the comments. The comments let me know that I am helping people. That makes the expense (of hosting and maintaining a web site) as well as the time and effort (required to generate the content) all worth it.

      Thanks for stopping by and for leaving such a kind comment.

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