Of what shall a man be proud, if he is not proud of his friends? – Robert Lewis Stevenson
Yeah, he’s a little Goofy, but even then if Max is your friend, you should be proud to call him such, right?
What does that mean?
To me, this quote is about who you hang with. Who are your friends? Are you proud of them? Are there some among your friends you would be embarrassed to be seen with, if a TV camera happened to catch you in the background?
Are there some among your friends you would rather not introduce to your family or your co-workers? Have you ever thought about that? What about them makes you reluctant to introduce them?
What does this split within yourself say about you, that you have some friends you think would be an embarrassment to introduce to other friends? I would be confused if I were in that situation, would you be?
Instead, I would work at having friends I could always be proud to be among, and to not ever be afraid to introduce to my other friends. Sometimes all a friend needs is a little help to overcome that which embarrasses you. Be a friend and let them know. Gently.
Why is having pride in your friends important?
There are many sayings in many countries that revolve around a person being known by who they associate with, or who their friends are. If you are proud of your friends, that says a lot about you, doesn’t it? And what does it say if you are not?
Being proud of your friends means that, on the whole, they are the kind of people you are. It means you approve, more or less, how they act and how they live. It means you stand by them, and largely trust them, their judgement, and their actions.
In short, you aren’t embarrassed to know them, or to be known as their friend. You are proud to be known as their friend, and are willing to stand by them, in life as well in photography. It also means you aren’t two faced, having some friends you are willing to be seen with, and some that you hide from others.
Where can I apply this in my life?
Well, this quote is all about being proud of your friends. If you already are proud of all your friends, I guess you’re done. Congratulations! If not, it’s time to try to figure out why you aren’t proud of them. Are you ready to look inside yourself?
The first thing is to figure out who is the “cool” crowd, and who are the embarrassments. Are all the uncool ones uncool for the same reason, or do you have a couple different uncool groups you hang out with? Grab some paper and write down the groups and the people involved.
Sometimes, they’re not really *your* friends, but friends of one of your friends, and you get dragged along with them. Make a decision to either be proud of them, help them understand what you would like to see change, or plan on having other things to do instead of hanging with them, right?
I consider it rather unfair to hang out with people you are not proud to be seen with, or of whom you are not really friends. The other people may feel you are their friend (after all, you *do* hang out with them quite a bit), and will likely be upset when you tell them to get lost, right?
I imagine that all of us have (or had) a friend or family member who, in certain circumstances, could be a bit of an embarrassment. Sometimes I’m that person, as my wife will occasionally mention she has three kids, including me.
But the point is that most of the time, you’re fine with them, and have no problems. It’s just after their fifth beer, they start singing, both loudly and off key. Or whatever it might be. If you can look past that, you can probably consider yourself proud of them, at least most of the time.
If not, you might consider how you could approach them to discuss the things that they do which are an embarrassment to you. They might not know how annoying they are being. If you aren’t comfortable talking directly to them, see if you can find someone else who is willing to do so for you.
The same goes for friends who aren’t part of the family. What do they do which embarrasses you? Can you talk to them or find someone who could? I call this “upgrading your friends,” which is not to be confused with trying to dump your existing friends for new ones.
It’s up to you, but I would give this some consideration. I haven’t gone into the possibility that you are the problem, having two groups of friends, but being embarrassed to mention your other groups of friends. That’s High School behavior, and poor behavior at that.
Be honest with them, and honest with yourself. If one of your groups of friends dislikes another group of your friends, you’re stuck in the middle. How will you react when one group makes fun of the other? Will you join in, or will you be proud of your other friends? What does your decision say about you?
If you aren’t proud of your friends, are they really your friends? Do they think that they are your friends, even if the feeling is not mutual? Is that fair to them to allow them to continue under a mistaken impression? Be honest with yourself, and be honest with others.
From: Twitter, @lobsterquotes
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/r/robertloui160476.html
Photo by Loren Javier
Happy Birthday to Robert Lewis Stevenson, born 13 November, 1850.
