No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. – Eleanor Roosevelt

Do you care if it’s called a rose or anything else? Would a rose care if you called it a dandelion? So why do we give our consent to others to make us feel inferior?

What does that mean?
This quote reminds me of another famous couple of lines about the meaning of words. “What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet” from Romeo & Juliet, Act 2, Scene 2, Lines 47,48. The names that someone calls you have whatever scent you chose to give them, and the same goes for the opinions others may have of you.

If you decide that word ‘smells’ bad, you may end up feeling bad. In doing so, you give the word, and therefore the person, your consent to make you feel inferior. You could just as easily decide the word smells nice, or at least neutral, denying the word, and therefore the person, your consent.

It really is that easy. It feels funny inside because of your habits, but as you train yourself to behave in a different manner, it will become more natural. But the thing to remember is that you believe in yourself, and your value as a person. Others may have their opinions, but of your value you are certain.

Why is believing in yourself important?  
If you believe in yourself, why should the opinion of someone else matter to you or your self-value? Yes, it’s nice to have the approval of certain people in your life, but if you don’t get it, you have to decide if you believe in yourself, or if they (and their opinion of you) is more important.

Now I don’t want you to think that I feel that believing in yourself means you ignore anything unflattering that others say. It just means that if an idiot is talking, take the source into consideration when evaluating what they say. If someone you trust has some constructive criticism, it doesn’t mean you stop believing in yourself, but it might be time to reevaluate and perhaps tweak some aspect of yourself.

Believe in your worth as a human being. Believe that you can do things, and use the evidence of the things you have done to bolster that belief. We might not be able to do everything right now, but given time and effort and some help, there is little we cannot accomplish, eventually. Really, you can do it, if you can believe in yourself.

Where can I apply this in my life?
Every story has two sides. Which will you believe about yourself? I’m not talking about hiring a PR firm to help you put a positive spin on things that didn’t work as well as you hoped. I’m talking about giving more weight to the important lessons you learned from the experience, and how you will use that insight the next time you try.

One way of looking at the event leads to feeling inferior. The other helps you believe in yourself. Either way, the choice is yours and yours alone. While that might sound a little bit silly, there really isn’t anyone else who can decide that for you, unless you give your consent to them.

What are some of the things you do, and do well? What are the things you do which usually come out alright, and from which learn when things don’t work out quite as well as hoped? What are some of the skills, talents, and abilities you have that set you apart from the crowd?

Are you feeling a little better about yourself? If someone came in right now and told you were somehow less of a person because you couldn’t do something they could, would you believe them, or would you be able to refuse to give your consent to them?

Would you be able to let them know you’re happy for them and their ability, skill, or whatever, but it really wasn’t something you were all that interested in? You don’t have to brag about what you can do, but you don’t have to feel inferior because you can’t match the braggart at his best skill.

Any time you’re feeling down, you’re probably focusing on the wrong side of the ledger. You’re focused on the things that have not gone the way you wanted, things that didn’t turn out, people who upset you, or things like that. Now you’re giving your consent to yourself to make you feel inferior.

Personally, I try to avoid that whenever possible. If I catch myself acting that way, I try to shake off the gloomy mood, and start focusing on the things that have gone well, or at least on the lessons I have learned from the other events in my life.

I try not to stay focused on the negative for any length of time, but try to guide my attention back to the things that are going well. Sometimes I have to really push it, and congratulate myself for eating breakfast without gagging on my spoon, or stabbing my tongue with the fork.

But at least that was something positive, right? I try to make sure I never give myself my consent to make myself feel inferior. I try not to run myself down. And if I do, I try to pick myself back up and point myself in a positive direction, and get started again. Sometimes it takes a few tries, but I don’t give up. Do you?

We all have evidence to found our belief in ourselves. We all have evidence to found a lack of belief in ourselves. Only you can make the decision as to which you will hold dear, and which you will ignore. The quote urges us to ignore those who would belittle us, and attempt to damage our belief in ourselves.

From: Twitter, @WomenOfHistory
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/eleanorroo161321.html
Photo by stephcarter

Happy Birthday to Eleanor Roosevelt, born 11 October, 1884.