Cultivating inner discipline is something that takes time; expecting rapid results is simply a sign of impatience. – Dalai Lama
I want patience, and I want it NOW!
What does that mean?
How many times have you become frustrated because you caught yourself doing something, even though you knew better? That is the heart of this quote. We all have things about us that we want to change, many of which are based on inner discipline.
However, that discipline isn’t always developed and made into habits as quickly as we might like. This frustration is a way of expressing our impatience. While such feelings are understandable, they must also be tempered with reality.
Things will rarely change as rapidly as we would like, and making them stick can be a problem. There are techniques that, when properly executed, can make powerful and lasting changes in our habits, inner discipline can, at times, be a challenge to nail down.
Why is patience important?
Patience, being the opposite of impatience, is one of those skills that is fundamental. With patience, much can be done, and much can be endured. Without patience, life can be really rough. Anything that doesn’t go your way, or as quickly as you want becomes an irritant.
Some use these irritants as an excuse to blame others. Others use the irritants to remind them that they have not yet completed their journey to patience. Not that anyone ever completes that journey, but some make it farther down the road than others.
Having patience allows us to shed the irritants as a duck sheds water. It allows us to smile when we try again, and it doesn’t work again. And again. Patience is what allows us to live with grace and to seem unaffected by the trials and tribulations of life. I hope to experience it some day. 8)
Where can I apply this in my life?
Patience is not my strong suit. I can endure much, but it’s not the same as having patience. Patience takes life’s troubles peacefully, with grace and a smile. Endurance takes the same troubles, but with a grimace, a groan, and a rude comment. I’m pretty good at endurance.
What patience I have learned, I have learned from my children. When they were younger, they have had even less patience than I did, and I could see the frustration rising in them. I have learned that by paying attention to myself, I can sometimes see the frustration rising in myself.
So what do you do to calm down once you notice you’re getting frustrated and about to lose your patience? Do what works for you. I take a deep breath, use a quick spoken line to remind myself that this isn’t worth getting upset about, and then let the breath out, visualizing the frustration leaving me with my breath.
Take a moment and think about some of the aspects of yourself and your inner discipline on which you are working. Are you working on patience? Are you working on eating better? Are you working on exercising? Are you working on becoming a non-smoker, or eliminating some other habit?
Cultivating inner discipline, the quote tells us, takes some time. While steps in the right direction can occur in large steps (at times), it is often a long, slow, walk in the general direction of our goal. In those times, when progress is slow, and change seems not to be happening, that we need to have patience.
Your list of things you are working on, how does it look? Grab some paper and write a few of them down. Write down how inner discipline will help you in that task. Think about what your end goal is, that is how much will things have to change to have achieved victory?
Now think about how each moves forward. Some things seem to move in a burst, and then not move again for months, while others seem to move one tiny bit at a time, each day or each week. Write down how the changes occur, when they occur, and how often they occur.
Look at each item on the list and write down what tends to frustrate you, what causes your impatience to come to the fore. When you have written something about each one, look at each and think about what you could do to help notice the frustration and impatience earlier, and what you might do to diminish them.
Would it be easier to deal with the slow progress if you could keep the worst of the frustration and impatience at bay? It is that way for me, and I hope it is that way for you. Take a moment and write down a few ideas that you think might help you be more patient as you work on your inner discipline.
Life isn’t easy, but neither does it have to be harder than necessary. I find frustration only makes things seem worse than they are. I also try to remember that frustration is usually the last step before getting it right.
I welcome that first taste of frustration as a sign that I am close, and then dismiss it, replacing it with hopeful expectations of getting it right. It doesn’t always work out that way, but it is easier to deal with. 8)
From: Twitter, @DalaiLama
confirmed at : it’s from his own feed…
Photo by Zach Klein
