It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it. – Douglas MacArthur
While this is just play, eventually, there will be real fights, with both pride and The Pride on the line. How far will they go?
What does that mean?
This quote is from one of the great Generals of the last hundred years. His exploits and his motivational speeches, and his ability to analyze a problem are all well known. This quote is a fairly famous one, or at least I have been familiar with it since my youth.
It says that going to war without being willing to do what is necessary to win it is futile, and could cost you everything. This is a problem more with modern liberal democracies, where the civilian population, amplified by the press, holds considerable sway in military decisions.
If you don’t know why you are fighting, what the definition of victory is, nor how you will convert from war to peace on the field of battle, you’re setting yourself up for failure. In war, failure can well be fatal, both for an individual soldier, as well as for a country.
Why is picking your battles important?
How often have you seen in movies, on TV, or in books, where someone decides not to have a fight with a friend or family member, saying something like “it’s just not worth the trouble” or something like that? Sometimes, really it isn’t worth the trouble.
Sometimes the argument is about something you are passionate about, and you are willing to do whatever it takes to win. OK, but then what. After you win, then what? How do you mend fences, or is it a scorched earth, “never going to speak to you again” style fight?
Other times, you might recognise the passion in someone else, and decide not to press the battle, as you know they will push harder than you are willing to, so your defeat is certain. In that moment, you have realized the wisdom of the quote, right?
Where can I apply this in my life?
Unless you are a dictator with an army at your command, this quote won’t be very useful in the stated military sense. However, it can be applied to the lives of everyday people. Despite our best intentions, friction (and therefore arguments, contests, or fights) happens.
Now what? How do you deal with life’s little disagreement (and the bigger ones as well)? To me, the more important question is regarding how you select which battles you will fight, and which ones you will pass on. And for the ones you start, how you determine how hard you will push, and how long.
Is the argument worth losing a friend over, or are you only willing to piss them off for a few weeks? Will you expect them to come to you and apologise, or will you offer the olive branch? A lot of people I know have been very surprised when I tell them they won, and then asked “Now what?”
It’s easy to bellow and break things, but when the roaring is done, how do you pick up the pieces? That’s a part of fighting the war. The winner inherits the battlefield, and all the unexploded ordnance, as well as all the broken things, including people.
In our lives, the unexploded ordnance is the bitterness and resentment which we may have generated in others due to our victory, or our methods in attaining it. The broken things could include the breaking of trust and hurt feelings. Hopefully there aren’t any broken people, that it didn’t escalate to physical violence.
There is a reality that states not all wars are winnable. Or more precisely, there sometimes comes the time when you realise that there is more to be gained by peace that continuing or escalating the war. That’s where one switches from inflicting damage, to damage control.
This goes back to the ideas of what do you do when the hostilities cease, either from outright victory or some negotiated peace? If you started with a “win at any cost” attitude, you may find peace a bit more difficult because of it.
I’m not saying don’t try to win, but instead that we should be careful in how we comport ourselves during the hostilities. Unless you plan on fighting to the death or fighting on forever, you should always plan not only for victory in war, but for the peace that follows.
From: Twitter, @streetstosucces
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/d/douglasmac125177.html
Photo by Tambako the Jaguar
