Let us be of cheer, remembering that the misfortunes hardest to bear are those which never come. – Amy Lowell
Here is an example of Ben's method, with weights associated with each pro or con.
What does that mean?
The quote starts on a high note, urging us to be ‘of cheer’ or happy. The reason why we should be cheerful? The rest of the quote says that we should be cheerful because we usually imagine the worst, and end up with a situation that is nowhere near as bad as we had feared.
It says the misfortunes that are hardest to bear are the ones which never come. This dread of the unlikely, but possible, is what I have seen paralyze many people. They worry about the worst possible case, even if it is almost impossible, and refuse to take action that is overwhelmingly beneficial to them.
Yes, one needs to be diligent about possible outcomes, but all outcomes must be ranked, weighted, and analyzed. Then you decide. If you decide to not act, then let it go and move on. Please don’t wallow in the low place between hope and despair, of hope for the best outcome, and fear of the worst. Make your decision and take action.
Why is making a decision important?
How often do we make decisions? Trivial ones might include what to wear when we get up, what radio or TV station you have on, or what to eat for breakfast. In some cases, habit dictates what you will most likely do, but you always have a choice.
We also have more important decisions to make in our lives. The decision is usually preceded by at least some analysis and thought (at least mine are, I understand there are less Anal-Retentive personality types out there). Even not making a choice is a choice in itself, right? You can’t sit on a fence forever!
Where can I apply this in my life?
For me, the best way I have found to make a decision is to give myself a deadline. Yes, in most cases it will be artificial, but if you don’t say that you’ll make a decision by early next week, how long will you let it drag out? A deadline gives you a sense of urgency.
There are many ways to make a decision. One of my favorites is Ben Franklin’s method of the Pro’s and Con’s table. Take a piece of paper and write the proposition you are considering across the top. Then make a line down the middle, label one side ‘Pro’ and the other side ‘Con’ and write down all the good and bad points. Let it sit for a few days, and with a clear head, evaluate whether you should take up the proposition or abandon it.
While this may be overkill for some things, it may be a bit simplistic for others. You will have to come up with a set of techniques that work for you. They will be based on how significant the decision is to you, and how much time you are willing to devote to the research.
What are some decisions you have been putting off in your life? Run through all the roles you play in your life, and consider what you have not yet decided in them. For the longest time, I put off having kids. Eventually, I gave myself a deadline and made a decision.
Write a few of these non-decisions down, at least two each of big decisions, medium decisions, and small decisions. Next to each, put a deadline by which you intend to have made your decision. For the small ones, probably measured in days, the medium ones, in weeks, and the big ones, in months.
Now that you know by what date you will have decided, it’s time to get busy on the details. What are the pro’s and con’s, or do you have another method you wish to use? To help you keep track of time, put this list somewhere where you will see it each day, so you never lose track of the deadlines. Give yourself enough time to do the research and to think it through. Then decide.
Once you have decided, either to pursue or abandon a path, the results will start to show themselves. Odds are the hardest to bear misfortunes (as stated in the quote) will not materialize to haunt you. Then again, you will probably not get as good a result as you might have hoped. But that’s why we try, try again!
With a deadline and a method that works for you, the future is as bright as you dare to make it. Yes, bad things can happen if you dare to do something, but bad things can also happen to those who do nothing as well. You must balance the risks with the rewards, the pro’s and the con’s.
It may take some practice, but eventually, you will find it easier to make decisions, and even become comfortable making them. Enough talk, it’s time to make a decision!
From: Twitter, @Aude28359
confirmed at : http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/a/amylowell169822.html
Photo by ursonate
Happy Birthday to Amy Lowell, born on February 9, 1874.
