If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.

If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be. – Unknown

Twoo Wuv. I mean “True Love.” From the movie The Princess Bride.

What does that mean?
To me, this quote is speaking of the most fundamental rule of the universe. Love isn’t owned and cannot be taken. It can only be given. This quote talks about mutual love and of the only valid test. If you love someone, you have to give them the freedom to choose for itself.

The freedom to choose is important, as sometimes a love is out of duty, loyalty, fear (of loneliness or retaliation) or for some other reason. In each of these cases, the love (true love) is only in one direction, the other direction of love is tainted by the reason for the love (something other than true love).

By turning the other person loose, they if they come back, it is (one hopes) because they love you, and the feeling is mutual. If they don’t come back, you would only have been fighting a losing battle to hold on to them. That is a battle that you will eventually lose, so lose it early and get on with your life.

Why is love (true love) important?
Let’s start with some definitions, shall we? Love is defined at thefreedictionary.com as “A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities or a sense of underlying oneness.” and “An intense emotional attachment, as for a pet or a treasured object.”

Another definition to consider is infatuation, which is defined as “A foolish, unreasoning or extravagant passion or attraction (synonym of love).” If we look at the second definition listed for love, and apply it to people instead of pets or objects, you can see how it would resemble infatuation.

To me, this is where I differentiate true love from common love. True love (you may use a different word) is between two people and is mutual in nature and based on the calling of the heart. Compare this with a relationship where one person has a form of love for the other, but it isn’t mutual. If you’ve ever experienced both kinds, you probably have a definite preference for what I call true love, right?

Where can I apply this in my life?
We all have relationships in our life. Some even rise to the level that makes it appropriate to use the word love. Whether it’s familial love, brotherly love, romantic love or whatever other label you may have, putting the word love in it, takes it to a whole new level.

How do you measure love, and what are the rules you expect love to use? What are the do’s and don’ts? Does everyone have the exact same list? Do you talk about where things stand often enough to notice that things are drifting apart, or is your first clue their last act of desperation?

An interesting description of what I consider true love, with proper motivation, can be found in the New Testament, 1st Corinthians, Chapter 13, Verses 4-7 :

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Read the whole passage, and compare it to some of the people you love. How well does your love score by this measure? I try to keep track of my loves and keep track of how well I am doing. How often have you measured your love? It’s not something most of us do very often, if ever, right?

You may have a different way to measure love, and that’s fine. Just be sure that your partners in love know what your scale is, so that everyone is on the same page. My wife and I chose the Biblical passage above for our wedding, so we would know how to measure our behavior and our love.

Take some time to determine what your definition of love is and how it is to be measured. Then share it with the people you love and see if they agree. It might end in a lively discussion (or worse), but if that’s the case, that discussion will occur eventually, right? Do it now, before there are years of resentment built into it, and that way the hurt may be lessened and may be easier to heal.

This is probably the scariest of all the quotes I have tackled, from a practical standpoint. Who wants to take a chance at losing someone they love? But, as the quote says, if they don’t come back, it wasn’t meant to be. So by not taking that leap of faith and turning them lose, you may end up pouring a lot of time and effort into a relationship that is destined to fail. And that hurts a lot more. Trust me on that one.

From: Twitter, @Quotes_on_Love
confirmed at : http://www.quotes.net/quote/18405
The photo is scaled and referenced from the IMDb entry for “The Princess Bride” (1987) by MGM

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1,214 Responses to If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.

  1. Lakeshia 14 August 2015 at 2:30 am #

    That was good. I was involved with a man and I Loved him with my soul. I have loved before, but I have never felt this way about anyone, he was my best friend. We talked about EVERYTHING, if anything happened good or bad, he was the first person I would call. I wanted to share every detail of my life with him. I thought for sure we would be married right now, but unfortunately that didn’t happen. We took a trip last summer and things have been rocky every since that point. We went from talking everyday, to 3 weeks with no communication at all. I tried everything to make him see, just how much I Loved him, but he kept giving excuses as to why we are at this point, and it just doesn’t add up, and it hurts so bad. So I finally made the decision to let it go, if he is meant for me he will come back. Walking away is not always so easy to do, but I had to let it go.

    • philosiblog 18 August 2015 at 9:58 pm #

      Thanks for sharing your experience. That is the crux of the quote, isn’t it? If you didn’t let go, you’d be fighting the fight every day until he left, and then all you’d have is month(s) or year(s) of regret, anger, and frustration. And he’s still gone. That’s not to say you don’t fight for what you want, but to realize that there is a time to let go.

      As I frequently say, we are all stronger than we know. We can do and endure far more than we imagine. You’ll get through this, and you will find someone worthy of you. It might be him, once he deals with his issues, or it might be someone else. But stay strong through the tough days, and enjoy the good ones.

  2. Diss 21 August 2015 at 7:31 am #

    Hi, I’m 18 now, I met a girl accidently or it was meant to happen because I kinda felt it happening before hand (gut feeling).
    So we got to know each other it turned into a relationship and so on. We we were best friends and we told each other about our past. She had been through a lot. A guy who used to like her, liked 2 girls at the same time and she got dumped and it turned into a bitch fight because the other girl was also a friend of hers. So at the same time, her mother told her that her mother and father are seperatedS and pretended to be together until she was at an age which she could understand the divorce.So when both of those things combined she was obviously devastated and she started getting trust issues. So she told me all of that and I also was there for whenever she needed me and it was a happy relationship. But when we spoke about our ex’s and what we had done and all I told her that I’ve been in a relationship before and I’ve caressed and all that but I never told her that I’ve gotten a blowjob and it was that intimate. But at that time she asked me if I’m not telling her anything thinking that she might freak out about me. But I said no because it was really uncomfortable for me to tell her that. So then we were happy the relationship continued I asked her out, and it grew we were about 1 year into the relationship. But last month I just couldn’t resist hiding anything from her, she always loved me and she was always honest with me, she trusted me 100% but I couldn’t lie to her because I loved her, I told her about the blowjob with my ex and stuff, she was shocked and she was hurt.She was really upset that I hid something from her. Then she made up her mind, her preception about me changed and she decided that we’re done and that I should move on. It hurt me so much, I realized that I had made a big mistake and I tried explaining to her, I was genuinely sorry for what I did. But she is independent, smart and I know that she’d never change her principles. But I always felt that she’s the one, cause everything about her I always got a gut feeling and ironically the first time I met her was at a trip organized for her by her parents to tell her that they’re seperated. I was always genuinely happy with her. I love her so much, it’s so hard for me to let go cause deep down inside something tells me that she’s the one, but I also know that she’s very independent and she won’t change her policies just like that. Also when she first started going out with me her mom advised her that serious relationships at this age won’t work. And her mom also told her that anyone who lies to their parents will eventually lie to their partners. My gf knew that I lie to my parents. So all in all she said that she can’t give me another chance and she might sound rude and selfish but she doesn’t need to put up with all this, she’s not married to me or anything, so she was like she cbb and I should move on.

    • philosiblog 22 August 2015 at 10:22 pm #

      Emotions can be tricky. Sometimes what sounds like a good and sound decision will turn around and bite you later on.

      As far as I can tell from your comment, she is gone for now. The only question now is what will you do with your time? I would recommend looking to the things you know you can improve within yourself, or to things you wanted to try, but didn’t have the time while she was around.

      Just as she came into your life out of nowhere and made a huge impact, there could be another out there for you. Learn from what you did (and failed to do), and grow from the experience. Stay strong, continue to improve, and become the best person you can be at this moment in your life.

      She might come back, but she might not. Your happiness depends on you, not on her, so find what makes you happy and pursue it.

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