Be loving. And if you don’t feel loving, then simply be kind. Kindness is just love in her daily clothes. – Alexandra K. Trenfor – still no bio 8(
What does that mean?
I like this quote in general, but with Valentines Day fast approaching, it seems even more interesting. Not everyone has a special someone in their life at this time, and this quote gives them, and the rest of us, some options.
There are times when romantic love just isn’t happening in your life. That doesn’t mean you have no love in your life, just that one particular flavor of it is missing.
And if you are in a particularly dark place, you can always work on being kind. Kind to others, as well as yourself. It’s a great first step to emerging from the darkness.
And the quote finishes by revealing a secret most people understood, but never could put their finger on. Kindness is a flavor of love. A little diluted, but love none the less.
Why is kindness important?
As was discussed above, kindness is a baby-step for love. It is a great place to start when you find yourself in a rough spot, or just aren’t in the mood for the bigger steps. It can be part of a longer term progression, or just what you do right now because it’s all the more you can manage.
In any case, kindness is something fairly easy, and applies to every situation. Some might apply an exception or two, but I believe that it can and should be applied in all situations. Just because you are being stern with someone doesn’t mean you aren’t being kind to them in the longer term.
Kindness, like love, leaves its mark on both you and the person or people to whom you show it. There is a great feeling that goes with a kindness, and doubly so when it results in the recipient(s) showing gratitude in return. Even if they do not, you still feel better for having been kind.
Can you imagine how much less pleasant your life would be if no one were kind to you, and you were not kind to anyone else? I have to say I’m not too fond of the idea, are you? Kindness is one of those little things which mean a lot, and help smooth over differences between people.
Where can I apply this in my life?
Rephrasing, where in my life is kindness applicable? Again, as before, I believe it can be applied everywhere. You may want to make small carve-outs based on your beliefs, but it still can go pretty much everywhere. How’s that for something tough to follow up? Use it. Everywhere. Just do it. Now. 8)
Some of the challenges I have received for my assertion that it can be used everywhere deals with people behaving badly. How do you act kindly towards them? In my mind, if you can intervene and stop them from behaving badly, then you have done them a kindness, even if they don’t think so at that moment.
Also note that whenever you interact with people, you have a wide range of options available to you. You can be a jerk, or you can be kind. Well, and then there’s all the ground between them, but you get the idea. The closer you are to the side of kind, the more you are using this quote.
So let’s try to narrow the starting point down a little bit, shall we? Where in your life are you most likely to be closer to ‘jerk’ than ‘kind’ to others, or even yourself? Are there certain times of day (pre-caffeine), places, or situations where you tend to be less than kind?
Most of us have those moments. The question then becomes how can you be more kind in those situations? My pre-caffeine response might only be kind by comparison, but I try to either warn them off, or otherwise let them know that I’m a little cranky. Surely, that’s kinder than just snapping at them, right?
Consider one of your less than kind situations. What else could you do in order to move a little farther away from ‘jerk’ and move a little closer to ‘kind’ in that situation? Can you come up with a couple of ideas, in case the first one doesn’t work out as well as you had hoped?
We all have good days, and days that are a little more challenging. Sometimes it’s easy to be loving, and other days it’s a struggle just to not be a jerk. If you take some time and search yourself for your weaknesses, you stand a chance at making life better for you and those around you.
Kindness is all around you. And, despite not wearing the flashiest clothes, it is still love. Take your time, and work on being kind to yourself, as well as to others. I believe it is well worth the effort. Do you agree?
From: I found this when trying to find a bio for her, as site below…
confirmed at : http://adamnathan.com/2013/02/06/daily-clothes-alexandra-k-trenfor/
Photo by Sheila Sund